Review: The Lovely Bones

Mark Wahlberg and Saoirse Ronan in The Lovely Bones.

Fourteen year old girl rediscovers life after being brutally murdered

The Lovely Bones (PG-13)

Director: Peter Jackson

Starring: Saoirse Ronan, Stanley Tucci, Mark Wahlberg, Rachel Weisz and Susan Sarandon

Genre: CGI-groomed Drama

Rating: *

There are some films which do the trick of generating a good buzz and then turning out so bad that you wondered why it was made. Peter Jackson’s The Lovely Bones is such a film. Yes, I said it right – PETER JACKSON – the guy who made Lord of the Rings. The Lovely Bones has it wrong from the first minute. The murdered girl, Susie Salmon feels happy that she was murdered so that she could see her father stand up for her.

And, seriously, 135 minutes is too long. The best part is I can’t even count my yawns while this movie was screened in a huge theatre when I could easily count the number of people who were watching it. The Lovely Bones is a tripping stone in Jackson’s career. Murder is not something with a positive side. It’s something with a totally negative side. Why does Jackson make murder sound like miracle in this film?

And check out those CGI will you! I have never seen something so cheesy and it feels like playing a game of Mario Bros. where you have either blue sky and green grass or dark sky and darker water. Oh yes! The animation bores you to the core and the murdered girl actually finds afterlife to be more interesting. Well, The Lovely Bones becomes satirical in between and Jackson opens up a flow of emotions that are totally unnecessary.

What do you get from this movie about a fourteen year-old girl who dies painfully and then prevents her murderer from getting murdered by the right person, her dad? Well, you sure do get the message. Find a serial killer who kills fourteen year-olds and then frame him as a hero. Stanley Tucci becomes a hero for playing a serial killer. Saoirse Ronan pulls off a neat role in the animated grassy patches of afterlife which according to the film is somewhere in between Earth and Heaven while as the parents of the murdered girl, Mark Wahlberg and Rachel Weisz play their parts well on the rough and tough Planet Earth.

Based on a best-selling novel by Alice Sebold, I wonder how Jackson has re-invented the bestseller into a box office bomb. The Lovely Bones fails to impress and those cheap-ass CGI or ‘A Peter Jackson film’ tagline will never help.

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